They Say I'm Crazy

People keep constantly saying I'm crazy...




I have no idea why they say that

Depressionseeker

Do not fool yourself thinking you'll be happier when under control. It's a lie. Happiness has no boundaries, just like every other feeling. Restrain one of them, you'll be restraining them all - every action itself creates an echo within Life.
Do not fool yourself thinking you'll hold your feelings and release them under control. It's a lie. A true feeling will only be true once it can't hold itself under restraints. Do not even think you understand your feelings, cause you don't. Feelings are unexplainable, they are trappers, painseekers.
Do not think you'll hold your feelings and therefore live with no pain. You can't, I'm sorry. Embrace pain like you embrace life; sometimes you'll only achieve the top through your own inmost disgraces. If you wish, if you want, you'll have to step through those great rows of thorns and cry, bleed and die. And reborn, and then die again. And then again. Like Hitch would say, we jump, praying God we'll fly, so we don't fall like rocks against the ground. And most of the times, we'll hit the ground. Like a bird that can't fly.
And it's better to live a miserable life than the life of a rock;
it's better to live in pain than with no feeling at all;
and if at your last breath, you weep and cry;
it's better than if you just died.

The Last Battle

He, at last, let himself cling to hope.
Not from a train of thought did he choose that, but through the inmost senseless pain he has felt. And from the weaving of (those) two songs did hopefulness come, for he finally endeavoured into the fog of pain he had created, thus facing what he had not feared before.

No mountains for you today.

Andara Mountain

It's so nice that you would die for it. It's so comfortable that you would die for it. It's so amazing that you would die for it. And at the end, you would enjoy it not.

Montanha Andara

Pois caught myself respirando profundamente hoje (por mais trocadilhos e piadinhas que isso possa trazer - ho ha ha) e ontem e nos últimos dias em Montanha Andara. Posso ganhar tanta coisa, e ainda assim, me sentir estranho.
Montanha andara. Assim como me faz sentir mais leve, me faz sentir mais pesado. Assim como faz me sentir mais criança, e consequentemente mais humano. E consequentemente mais sozinho.
Me passem o copo.

Leading to Misunderstandings

Life works in a strange way. Must I say there is abscence, and hopelessness, though. For I don't know what happened there, and don't know why things went ill, and I thank thee God for having done everything calm. Wanted I the knowledge that no one's got for me; a brilliance should it be, but it won't, unless it brings itself the proper knowledge, and hope. I do not know the reasons, though I am happy everything's right and that's enough, and should I not be worrying about anything else. But once again, I shall ask, for I see lies and askance shall be brought up in the future.
But for now, I am glad.

Finally Free

..and all had gone ill; and darkness surrounding him was speaking a lone voice; "you have been expected. And here thou art". And he stood there, for there was fear in his heart, and rejection, and pain, and all those restrained feelings he had got; but at those words at his heart, he enlightened; he turned his head towards the sky and made a pray, for all that illuded him to be gone, and for all that enslaved him, to elude. And at that thought, darkness stopped her light and everything went calm. In that calmness, he dropped a tear, a tear of freedom.
Because at that, finally, he was able to cry.
He was finally free.

A New Dawn

It's been set a new dawn... An old twilight is getting through.

I stand here. In the middle. Here between light and dark. Here where we are. Where I loved, what I wait for.
This is a kind of goodbye letter. It's been an year and two months that I've been at Fisk, and I couldn't say that I haven't loved this. I have loved every inch of this, I have enjoyed every smile and effort and all other emotions that you have showed me. Staying in touch with such feelings from people is something undescribable to whom hasn't taught. The energy exchange felt during a class is amazing, it's like a river of emotions constantly flowing, and in a position which gives you a kind of control (although also a misguiding belief that you have control) above all that.

To my students, well, what can I say? You have been amazing. This all has been amazing. I'm leaving for I need a future, and to try new things, cause that's life and sometimes we've got to choose a path that is not so clear now, in order to find new places and better horizons. You have granted me a wonderful new sight of the world, you have given me the pleasure of your presence for more than a day, or even weeks or months. How could I thank you? You are all now part of my life, and this can't be erased. It will keep on for the rest of my life. I hope you all learn English, I really hope! But most of all, I wish that you keep being such wonderful human beings, and more and more responsible, and smarter, and everything else.

It hurts me to leave, but in life, there are choices. I have taken mine, and I hope you understand.
Thank you very much.

With love,
Teacher Murilo

Surtar

É porque hoje eu decidi que não vai ser do jeito que é.


Sim, mais uma vez! Mais uma vez eu vou ser do mesmo jeito que sou.





Porque é o jeito que sou. Cada um com o seu burden.



Saúde!

Terror.

Your eyes are way too gleaming.

V.a.l.i.u.m.

You still have no idea how deep it is, do you?
Throwing up like that, for nothing.
You still have no ideia.
'Till the idea makes you throw out your lungs and heart, and tears will fill not your face, but your grace's.
And then you'll realize that you're still too damn eagerly pointed ere something so evil dies.

Shoelace Happiness

...and then she came rushing into the classroom, and she was looked upon and answered: "Teach, I have had problems", as the other answered, "Are you Danielle? Yes, I have been told of your problems" with a sarcastic grin upon her face.



(This one's to you, dear Baggy! And a reminder - if you know what I mean!)

Nothing to Write About

“Would you help me?” asked he, staring at the doctor’s eyes. “Even if my disease reaches that, would you help me?”
“I’m here to help” answered the doctor, strolling around the room checking his watch. “I would never give up on you, if so you wish, and if you don’t give up on me. Will you give up on me?”
“I won’t. You know I won’t. It’s that it’s just been so long, and this sickness refuses to leave. I wish it had been gone away by now, but sometimes things just don’t happen like this.”
“They don’t. And that’s why life’s so precious. We struggle to have it” and the doctor stepped away, opening the drapes. A dim sunlight came into the room, washing away the pure darkness inside.
“Yeah. But this struggle seems to never end.”
“My precious... It will end. I assure you.” said he, as he approached to the bed. With gleaming passionate eyes he finished; “You will be alright. Now just get some sleep, will you?”
“I will.” the other answered. “Thank you.”

You’re welcome.

lullaby

He's such a powerful man
to stand all that

Won't disappoint you, light
it has been hard, but I won't
don't give up on me,
I'm holding on, I said I would
please, please, don't forget me
unstopping light

he's such a powerful man.
or an extremely weak one.

Tudo é uma escolha
E tudo muda, evolui
Talvez não como vemos a evolução,
Mas ainda sim o faz
E eu me dizia que eu nunca deixaria acabar
Mas percebemos que não somos nós que deixamos algo acabar, pelo menos não sempre
Percebemos que as vezes o mundo nos diz para acabar
Porque o fim,
Não é tão ruim
E as vezes é melhor terminar enquanto as memórias são boas
Porque nem sempre é melhor correr atrás do abandonador,
Nem sempre é certo abandonar quem nos abandona,
As vezes é melhor simplesmente se despedir,
E ninguém abandona ninguém
Porque os amigos mudam,
Crescem, conhecem, se transformam em pessoas totalmente diferentes,
E é melhor se despedir antes com o eu te amo,
Do que atrasado com o eu te odeio,
E não que isso seja sempre triste,
Ou sempre extremo,
Somente é um caso,
de muitos casos que podem acontecer
O estranho é não captar a essência,
Parece que a essência acabou,
Mas as vezes nunca houve essência,
Talvez a essência foi só ilusão.

E talvez nada disso seja feito verdade,
Talvez seja só o momento,
Mas agora eu creio de verdade
Agora que todas as coisas somam
Que amigos também mudam
E talvez não queiram mais ser amigos,
Nem amantes,
Nem a dor,
Apenas querem esquecer

Eu te libero, então, oh pássaro sem cordas, sem gaiola e sem noção,
A mim já não estás preso há muito,
E com as tuas asas pode voar para longe,
E não esperes me encontrar

Weirdness

I've been feeling weird
It's like, it's there
But where?
I like to know, sometimes
Don't know if she also likes
I was whispered a tale
But yet it seems I've failed

Cause no doom is good enough,
No love could heal me up
Could anything be that strong?
Not all want to be good
And those who wish, are they good?

And yet I think about it
She's not a healer,
Though I'd want it
She's just a miracle,
Do I deserve one?
Miracles make things way too easy
And I haven't been much of a prayer

Thence, here I stand
The same place from where I came
And if a miracle's too much light
I'll let her glow at her own time
Just like a bluebird's singing flight
I'll watch my loving of her sight

Oh, heroiclessness
I have come for thy judgment.

Quem se define, se limita

Não concordo.

Não concordo mesmo, embora eu veja um erro de semântica. Muito menos que definição, caracterizar-se significa tentar organizar os pensamentos sobre si mesmo, e, conseqüentemente, entender-se mais. E a partir do momento que isso acontece, você tem mais liberdade pra crescer, aprende a contornar mais suas próprias barreiras e possui mais chances de evoluir.

Escrever o que todo mundo escreve é fácil. Refletir sobre isso é o que falta.

Esse seu amor é tão lindo

O amor é tão lindo
Você olha pra ele, ele te olha
Seus olhos brilham, ele diz que te ama
Ele te ama, ah ele te ama
Olhos não mentem
E você o beija, e vocês saem,
E se conhecem, e você o ama
E vocês se amam
E você o olha pela foto, e te dá saudade
E ele te ama,
E você o ama,
E vocês se amam,
Três vezes no dia.
E vocês voltam a se olhar,
Como são lindas as coisas,
Até que ele/a ama outra/o,
E você percebe que o amor nunca existiu.

("Não canto para falar só de mim mesmo...")

Meus Agradecimentos à Saudade

E eu penso nos amigos meus
E agente pensa como não se esqueceu
De tanta gente que passa pela gente
De tanto amor que alguem nos deu
Eu sinto saudade, existe a ansiedade
De ver quem não se esqueceu

Tenho amigos em Porto Alegre,
Em Tupã, Bauru, Campinas, Salvador
Outros em outros lugares,
Perdidos, mas não a amizade,
E se eu visse todos eles, todos
Não haveria maldade
Eles mostrariam-me o que éramos,
Riríamos do que fomos,
Espantaria-nos o que somos,
E aliviaria-nos a saudade
Que cresce sempre sem maldade
E antes eu pudesse voltar àquela idade

Tenho pessoas a quem amo,
E que talvez não pensem que as amo,
Mas talvez saibam que as amo,
E talvez em sonhos eu as chamo,
Perdido em idéias, perdido sem sono
Elas brilham e me lembram de quem fui,
Elas brilham e me guiam pelo sol,
Brilho estrela, como a saudade
Que queima forte,
sem maldade.

E queria que elas lessem
Esse hino a nós que somos destes
Lugares quentes que nos lembramos
E que em sonhos nos chamamos
Sem dor, a alma não brilha
Obrigado por terem sido de quem tanta falta sinto
É afinal, o que fez tudo ter valido

E que um dia nos reencontremos,
E possamos celebrar.

Sparks

Look, sparks
Out in the starless night
I think you're with me today
Sorry if I didn't say
If I'm torn apart
It's just for you
Look, sparks
Out in the starless night
I didn't say for I didn't know
I'm torn apart

Look, sparks
In your starry eyes